Sequels: The Sequel
Been to the video store recently? Scan the new release wall and you’ll quickly discover that there is a straight to DVD sequel to a film that you only vaguely remember anyway. Take an extra moment to pick up any one of these and you’ll discover something else: That movie is most likely a straight to DVD sequel of several other straight to DVD sequels that you never cared to see either. I’m not quite sure why Hollywood works this way, but somewhere somebody must be making some serious cash off of The Land Before Time XIII: The Wisdom of Friends (after 13 films, I’m sure there’s lots of wisdom to go around). Here are a few of my favorite DVD sequels that you most likely missed out on in the last year:
Free Willy 4: Escape From Pirate’s Cove
How the hell did Free Willy ever become a franchise? Didn’t they free him in the first film? Does he keep getting trapped again? If so, that dumb ass whale deserves to die. What a jerk. Anywho, this movie looks awesome. Check out that trailer! It has that fuzzy “we swear it’s film” look that a lot of straight to DVD films have, the “acting” talents of Bindi Irwin (ten bucks says she finds a way to rap in the film), and poor Beau Bridges stumbling around in what appears to be a homemade pirate costume. Personally? I’m fanning it on Facebook as we speak.
Bring it On 5: Fight to the Finish
Yes, you read that right, this is part 5 of the Bring it On saga. What exactly is this “it” and when do they plan to finally have it brought on? Let’s just hope that putting the word “finish” in the title implies that this is definitely going to be the last film. The space limit on my Netflix queue means I can only hold four Bring it On films. Also, what’s up with the guy on the cover? Even he is all like, “…the hell?”
Step Up 3D
Not really straight to DVD, but I had to put this on here as a warning. Early reviews are calling this the best 3D dance film since Avatar. Oh, and according to the IMDB cast list, the characters have great names like Cable, Moose, Hair, Backround, Jenny Kido, and Press Box Patton. Clearly, if Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo had been in 3D they would still be pumping out sequels to it out as well.
More to come as soon as I catch up on those Land Before Time movies. Wait, Cuba Gooding, Jr. is in the new one?