Sep 28 2010

Coming This Fall to the CW…

Every five years or so Bret Easton Ellis reminds me why I love him.  Usually it’s in the form of a new book, but a few weeks back he did it in a new way: Parody.

While it’s easy to believe in the first few minutes that this promo for All That Glitters is an actual CW show, it soon veers into wonderful Ellis territory, then just becomes a flat out parody of his style and the type of shows that appear on the CW.  Oh, and MAJOR bonus points for getting Ellis to play himself.  I really hope he had something to do with the writing.


Sep 9 2009

Logan’s Top Five College Films of All Freakin’ Time

I think South Park said it best: “There’s a time and place for everything- and it’s called college.”  The following movies are the finest examples of why this statement is true.  They’re also insanely funny, highly quotable, and will hopefully remind you why it was worth the money you’re still paying on those student loans.

5.  National Lampoon’s Van Wilder (2002)van wilder
“Crazy kids with their crazy VDs.”
-Van Wilder
Allow me to be honest: National Lampoon’s Van Wilder has an incredibly weak script, a finale that revolves around lots of pooping, and the “acting” ability of one Ms. Tara Reid.  But you know what?  It’s easy to forget about all of that when you have Ryan “I swear I’m not Chevy Chase” Reynolds as your title character.  This was the role that finally brought him to Hollywood’s attention and it saves what otherwise would have been yet another straight to DVD National Lampoon film. 
Rating: ★★★★★★★☆☆☆  7 out of 10 

4.  National Lampoon’s Animal House (1978)animal-house
“Grab a brew.  Don’t cost nothin’.”
-Bluto

There’s really not much I can say about this film that you don’t already know.  If you went to college/been within 20 feet of a college/heard of the word “college” before, then you’ve most likely already seen this film more times than you care to mention.  What can I say?  It’s a classic.
Rating: ★★★★★★★☆☆☆  7 out of 10

3.  The Rules of Attraction (2002)rules1
“He’s not OD-ing.  He’s a freshman.  Freshmen don’t OD.”
-Paul Denton
Chances are that you’ve never heard of Roger Avary, which is a shame.  Here’s what you don’t know: He’s the other guy who won the Best Original Screenplay Oscar for Pulp Fiction.  Yeah, he could have cashed in on the  Tarantino name for years to come, but he chose instead to take his career as a writer/director in a different direction when he adapted Bret Easton Ellis’ satirical 1987 novel. Unlike the other films on this list, this is not a college movie about the goofy guy with the wacky friends that gets the girl in the end…this is a film about the people you tried your best to avoid in college.  Oh, and as long as you’re not easily offended, it’s also damn funny.
 Rating: ★★★★★★★★☆☆  8 out of 10    

2.  Slackers (2002)slackers
“I like you.  I’ll probably give you a nickname.”
-Cool Ethan
I always thought that this would be one of those little seen comedies that would slowly build a large underground following, much like Office Space.  Seven years later (and a 4.8 average rating on IMDB) and I’m still wondering when it’s going to happen.  The biggest problem that people seem to have with this movie is that Jason Schwartzman is not acting like he’s in a Wes Anderson film.  Unlike Anderson, it’s obvious that the director of Slackers just let Schwartzman go nuts with the character.  That, combined with Critical End! fav Devon Sawa and a large cast of people you’ll recognize from the late 90’s, make this a must see.  Oh,and good luck getting this Schwartzman written closing tune out of your head:

Rating: ★★★★★★★★☆☆  8 out of 10 

1.  Dead Man on Campus (1998)deadman
“You can’t be suicidal if you’re singing show tunes!”
-Cooper
Looking back, it seems like it was one of those all too rare nights when the comedy gods were on my side: It was my second night of college life.  I was in an entirely new world surrounded by strange people and experiences which I was totally unprepared for…when suddenly this movie came on TV and taught me everything I would need to know about the next few years.  Simply put, Dead Man on Campus is the greatest film about college life ever made.  It’s one of those sneaky films that you’ll find yourself quoting for months after and wanting to watch again and again.  While the very funny and original script is to blame for much of this, it’s really hard to mention this movie without bringing up the fact that it should have launched Mark Paul Gosselaar’s post Saved by the Bell career.  This is definitely one of those “time and place” movies, the likes of which we may not see again for a long time.
Rating: ★★★★★★★★★☆  9 out of 10

Okay, now it’s your turn.  Agree?  Disagree?  Let me know what I missed.


Mar 27 2009

UPDATE: The Informers in Theaters April 24th

the_informersLess than 24 hours after my last post about how unfortunate it was that the adaptation of Bret Easton Ellis’ The Informers was heading straight to DVD, I received an email from the fine people over at Senator Distribution assuring me that I needn’t fear.  Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it would seem that your ol’ Uncle Logan shouldn’t believe every fanboy rumor that he reads on the Internet.

What I should have said:

Hey, kids! The Informers looks like it’s going to be completely awesome!  And you know what?  It’s going to be in theaters April 24th, which is less than a month away!  I read some rumor online about it going straight to DVD.  Luckily, I was smart enough to fact check a few things first before I ran that unbelievable story.  How dumb would it be if I didn’t take the time to do that, huh?  Blah blah blah I’m Logan and I like movies blah blah blah…

Senator Distribution was also kind enough to send over some great EPK material, including clips and stills from the movie.  In the days leading up to the release, I’ll make sure and throw some of that up as a teaser to try and get more of you into the theater seats.  Until then, here is what you need to know:

1. None of that straight to DVD nonsense.  It’ll be in theaters April 24th.
2. I can not apologize enough for the mistake.
3. According to a great website I just found, Big Foot is being held in a military prison base outside of Dalton, GA.  Release the Foot!


Mar 26 2009

Disappear Here: A Few Words on Bret Easton Ellis

Bret Easton Ellis.  Don't worry.  He's never heard of you either.

Bret Easton Ellis. Don't worry. He's never heard of you either.

NOTE: This article is slightly inaccurate, specifically the news that The Informers is going straight to DVD.  The film will actually be in theaters April 24, 2009.  More information can now be found here.

Is it wrong of me to think that Bret Easton Ellis’ American Psycho is one of the funniest novels ever written?  Wait.  You know what?  I’ll even take that a step further: American Psycho is the funniest AND most important novel of the nineties.  That’s right, I said it.  So why is it that most people still have no clue who Bret Easton Ellis is?  Maybe it’s because nobody quite understands him, myself included.

And nobody misunderstands him more than Hollywood.  Granted, the film versions of American Psycho and The Rules of Attraction have both been beyond excellent*, but we can’t forget about the Ellis disowned double feature of Less Than Zero and (sigh) American Psycho 2: All American Girl.  Like many of the best authors, his work has been called unfilmable, but hey…that’s never stopped Hollywood before.

Christian Bale in a scene you didn't see in Newsies.

Christian Bale in a scene you didn't see in Newsies.

Enter The Informers.  Based on the 1994 book of linked short stories by the same name, The Informers has always been my least favorite of Ellis’ novels.  It’s still worthy of a fine 7 out of 10, and I could spend all day telling you why, but this isn’t a book review site, so let’s just cut to the chase. No other Ellis novel screams “movie adaptation” more than The Informers. The stories are short, easy to understand (kinda), and feature some of his best satire of none other than the city of Los Angles itself.  I’m kind of surprised Hollywood didn’t make this movie three years ago.

Except they did.  See, The Informers has been sitting on the shelf for over three years and I can’t quite explain why.  With a cast that features Kim Basinger, Billy Bob Thornton, Winona Ryder, Chris Isaak, and the now bankable again Mickey Rourke, it should have been a sure thing.  Maybe it’s the fact that the novel also features club hopping vampires and gay aliens that scared the studios away.

Whatever the reason, it was announced last week that The Informers is now going straight to DVD, which must be both pleasing and insulting to Bret Easton Ellis.  Despite all the drama, I have to admit that I can’t wait.  Check out the trailer for yourself below and let me know what you think.  In the meantime, if you read this far than you now know who Bret Easton Ellis is.  That makes me happy.

(Note: This trailer is HIGHLY uncensored, so you might want to remove any children or small pets from the room now)

*As crazy as this may make me sound, American Psycho is one of three films in my top ten favorites that has the word “psycho” in the title. It is joined by Hitchcock’s Psycho and Charles Busch’s hilarious Psycho Becah Party. Needless to say, I’m a hit at parties.